This is a highly controversial tale. A tale with one origin which has somehow morphed into a second tale.

Since it has been requested, I guess I’ll provide the original anecdote I was told and then give the amended version that I got a couple of years ago. As I was not present for the event to which there are conflicting historical tales, I can only tell you what I was told; I do not vouch for the validity of either tale, but I do have a preference for which one really happened.

Original tale (as originally told circa 1997):
A family member was bar hopping one evening in a college town in central NY. One of the members of the group was pretty well wasted, but they all decided to stop for pizza at a pizza parlor in town in between stops at the bar.

It was, at that point, very late. Late enough, at least, for a pizzeria to be closing up for the night. Each person ordered some of the remaining slices on the counter. The wasted individual inquired to the clerk whether any slices of pepperoni pizza remained, to which the clerk responded, “no.” The wasted individual, in an extremely loud, obnoxious, and whiny voice exclaimed, “THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEFE!!!!” (You MUST follow this link and hear my rendition of the audio)

Updated tale (as told in 2009):
A family member was bar hopping one evening in a college town in central NY. One of the members of the group (appropriately named “Piss”), who was pretty well wasted, sat down on a street curb and yelled, “MY LIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEFE!!!!” in an extremely loud, obnoxious, and whiny voice.

My opinion:
I shared the first story with a number of people that I met in college (1997-2001). I am sure that if I can get them to read this, they’d corroborate that the facts in the original tale were what they were told by me over 10 years ago. There is a non sequitor leap in logic at that point to prove this to be the actual account, but I am willing to take that risk. While both stories exist in a realm of things you’d never expect to happen, doesn’t the first one seem more credible anyway? The details seem too specific to be incorrect.

So, just because I was asked, I have made available a t-shirt sporting this slogan. Anyone can get one, and they probably will.

8 Comments for this entry

  • Chuck Miller says:

    Wow… just ten levels of wow. He he he he he he…

  • Jen says:

    After reading this, I think it’s the best day of my liiife!

  • Jeff says:

    OK, I was not expecting a soundclip attached to the post. That makes this even more awesome.

    • derryX says:

      I need to make it clear that I couldn’t have come up with so many specific details of a story that didn’t happen to me on my own. The sound clip is part of that.

  • Phil says:

    I’d say both of the stories are unbelievable and think someone was pulling your chain both times.

  • Darth says:

    I recall that I was pretty well wasted in a college town, sitting in the street curb during a certain ocassion involving a pocket knife. However, I was not yelling anything about my life . . . I was calling ex girlfriends telling them how great their vagina’s were. Anyway – i’m definitely getting the t-shirt once I know what size i’ll be.

  • as the afformentioned pissy family member. the 2009 version is correct as i lived this… pepperoni and pizza NOT FUNNY a crying Spanish kid screaming MYYYYYYY LIFFFFFFEEEEEE is comedy gold!

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