XProtege saw Jersey Shore 3 – Episode 5

The episode starts with Jenni and Snooki at Jenni’s house in Long Island. She’s still being dramatic over Tom leaving with her posessions. They show the girls trying to change the locks; it doesn’t happen. They say they’re gonna call some people in, but this point is never resolved.

Snooki’s friend, Ryder, shows up at Seaside. She is there to celebrate her birthday. Vinny lets her in, and there are awkward moments since they slept together. Since Snooki is away, Deena steps in and takes Ryder out on the Boardwalk. They get some drinks and ride on some of the rides; the whole time, Ryder keeps saying she’s going to puke.

Snooki and Jenni return to seaside, and everybody goes out. Ronnie talks to a girl who he says is his friend’s girlfriend, and Sam gets jealous because she doesn’t recognize this girl. Vinny talks to a girl who has an entourage, including an older guido who claims to be her uncle. Vinny gets this girl to go home with him, and Mikey and Pauly also bring girls home.

Sammi and Ronnie have some more drama which leads to Ronnie throwing all of her stuff out of her closet while she is downstairs getting him pizza. He complains that she brought pizza and not a protein shake. The whole time, Ronnie has this ominous laugh. Sammi breaks down and starts to cry, and Ronnie tells her that her “tears mean shit to him.”

Mike takes his girl inside to go to bed, and Pauly’s girl follows. Vinny pulls out the “Grenade Whistle” to warn Mikey. Meanwhile, Vinny’s girls’ entourage, including her “uncle,” shows up and take her home. Vinny makes a joke about this being Romeo and Juliet.

The grenade leaves the house.

Jenni approaches Ronnie and consoles him. Ronnie is crying like a wimp. Jen tells him that the only reason she told Sammi about Ronnie in season 2 was to get Sammi to leave. Jenni then continues to lay the insults about Sammi on.

Mike goes to Sammi looking for condoms. She nor Ronnie have any [she must be on the pill]. Sammi asks Mike where Ronnie is, and he tells her that Ronnie is talking to Jenni. Sammi gets pissed and runs downstairs to confront Ronnie, who wants no part of her. She asks Ronnie if he’s friends with Jenni and he replies, “yes.” Sammi decks Ronnie in the jaw.

The rest of the crew start a birthday celebration for Ryder.

Sammi is crying on the phone, and she tells someone to pick her up. The rest of the crew jump in while Sammi is packing and talk her out of leaving.

JWoww sleeps with Roger.

Sammi apologizes to Ronnie, and they cuddle. She tells him that she’s going to work on her relationships with everyone in the house. Sam then calls her mom and tells her that she punched Ronnie in the face. Her mom is supportive and tells her to make the best of her relationship now.

Vinny and Snooki go out and buy a stripper pole. They install it between the kitchen and dining room, and Ronnie doesn’t stop playing with it (he actually has wanted one since the very first episode of Jersey Shore, ever!). Vinny makes a joke and says no fat girls can go on it.

The guys go for haircuts and then the gym. At the barbershop, the barber tells them that he heard a rumor about Deena. At the gym, Mikey teases Deena that he knows something that she likes to do. When she realizes what it is, she somehow pinpoints it to Dean (the Ronnie look-alike from episode 4) and, next time she sees him out at the club, she calls him out for spreading incorrect rumors. [There were a lot of bleeps, but the captions said “Deena likes to l*** a******.”]

At the club, Jenni and Sammi make up, and the episode ends.

This was a decent episode. The drama between Ronnie and Sammi is getting a little old. It’s nice to see everyone getting along in the house. It’s also kind of sad it had to come to violence in order for that to happen, but that’s TV.

Episode Rating – 4/5


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